Love of the Game, Erotic Sports Anthology

Hello lovers of sex, romance and sports!

When I saw a request for submissions for an erotic anthology on the theme of sports I knew I had to get involved. I’m a big fan of rugby and you can often find me watching a game at the weekend. After making my submission, I had the nerve wracking wait to find out if my rugby piece had been accepted.

love of the gameAs you can imagine, I am ecstatic to have my story published in the “Love of the Game” anthology. It’s full of erotic stories on the theme of sports and is coming out next week – Tuesday, 18th October, 2016.

I’ve been inspired to write about rugby players and their naughty romances for a couple of years now. However, my story for this anthology was slightly different. We often hear about men in sports but I wanted to focus on women. Here is a summary of the story and a short excerpt. You’ll have to read the whole story to find out more about Leah and Wes and what they get up to on the rugby pitch.

Join me while I play host at the “Love of the Game” anthology Facebook party. I’ll be asking and answering questions and sharing thoughts between 6 and 7pm on 18th October. The party will take place all day so feel free to drop in from 9am (GMT).

rugby short storySummary

All Leah has ever wanted is to play rugby professionally. That dream has finally been realised and in 24 hours she joins the Great Britain Sevens Rugby Team to make her international debut at the Olympics in Rio. But there’s one thing that could ruin it. Leah is consumed by her fear of failure.

The night before she flies out to Rio she finds herself at her old rugby club where she bumps into a former teammate and the guy she always had a crush on, Wes Ashworth. Will Leah be able to get over her panic and realise her dreams? Will Wes find out about her crush and the time she saw him in the team showers? Maybe he’s just what she needs. Sometimes all is takes is one player to change the outcome of a match.

Excerpt

Glowing red she caught the sight of those heart stopping dimples once more. “I have an idea. We should practice tackles.”

“Dressed like this?”

If you’re too chicken…”

“Don’t test me,” he replied, his eyes burning through the thin material of her bikini top.

“I might have to lose my jeans though, the material is quite restrictive.”

His eyes widened, hope, lust and anticipation smacking together. It gave her the confidence she needed. With a cheeky smile she flicked open the buttons and ditched the constrictive material.

The audible gulp coming from his mouth as he took in the tiny patch of material covering her pussy lips competed with the thrill she felt when crowds cheered her name.

“So every time I pulled the string, that patch of material rubbed against your…?” His voiced strained, it sounded sandpaper dry.

“Yes, every time, and if you’re that good when you don’t know what you’re touching then I can’t imagine how good you are when you do,” she toyed with him. “Now are we going to stand here chatting or are we going to do some tackling? Or are you too chicken after all?”

With that she grabbed the rugby ball from his hands and started running down the pitch in just her bikini and trainers.

The arousal from knowing he was watching her with eyes that had coveted her body had her panting before she was halfway down the pitch. The incessant giggling wasn’t helping either. Looking back she sucked in a breath. Wes was bearing down on her, his eyes full of hunger.

“I guess Donkey isn’t as fit as he used to be.” Leah’s excited giggles transformed to laughter, throwing her off completely.

D is for Dick Pic: How to do it Properly (or at least Better)

dick pic anonymityIn my last post, D is for Dick Pic, I talked about some of the reasons men choose to send pictures of their dicks to virtual strangers.

Some people find photos like these a form of harassment. Others find them harmless and there are those that get a bit of excitement and a turn on from them. If you’re going down the route of sending a dick pic, tit pic, fanny photo or something a bit more teasing then there’s some things you need to keep in mind.

Stay Safe While Taking and Sending a Dick Pic

Consider using a filter on the photo or some sort of subtle effect. It will help hide some of the blemishes and bits you’re less proud of and might make you feel more confident. I’m not suggesting airbrushing it within an inch of its life but a few subtle changes in lighting can go a long way. Apps like Snapseed can be your new best friend.

If you’re a woman who wants to take a tit pic or underwear shot and you’re a bit belly conscious then take it lying down with the camera near your head and angled down your body.

Invest in some nice underwear. Although the other person probably won’t be looking at it, wearing something tight fitting, lacy or pretty will bolster your confidence. No one wants a photo with skid marks or unsightly stains on the clothing unless they’re into a whole different kind of fetish. You want the person you’re messaging to be excited, not preparing the washing machine.

Always check the background of the photo before it’s sent. We’d probably hate for the potential to see our box of sanitary towels, the reflection of our nipples, some really freaky sex toys that we failed to mention we’re into or, even worse, our home address on a letter! Try not to become one of those Social Media laughing stocks when your photo is circulated for all the wrong reasons.


Less is More

If you’re thinking of sending a naked photo maybe you should consider some other options first. You could try sending a photo of yourself in a pretty dress or sexy suit, a fancy dress outfit or even some sexy underwear. It doesn’t matter what the potential wants to see you in, you’re in control. It’s your camera and your body. If the potential doesn’t like what you send them then they can bugger off. It’s meant to be a flirty and fun option. It’s not a reason to be treated negatively or feel like you’re fending off unruly demands.

No Criminal Activity

If you’re under eighteen, don’t send or receive any photos. Don’t put someone else in the situation where they could get in trouble. Don’t request photos from anyone under eighteen either. It’s illegal and you could end up with a police caution or, for more serious cases, on the sex offenders register.

Don’t share anyone else’s private sexual photos and films without their consent. Revenge porn is a criminal offense and if you do it then you’re also a completely nasty fuckwit.

Finally, and in my opinion this is the most important one to remember, never and I mean never, unless you’re in a very trusting, long-term relationship, never ever include your face in the sexual photos or films you send. Some people are shitheads and, illegal or not, will still use the photos to threaten you, for shits and giggles, post them online for humiliation purposes or as a boast, or keep them in their online wank bank, indefinitely. It’s even been a story on Coronation Street. There are people in this world you’d never want to see your pillowcase up close, let alone your intimate fun zones. So have a good think before you send any photos and never show your face.

My Own Dick Pic Experiences

Dick picI’ve only ever received one dick pic that included the face. We’ll call him Harry Beaver because his preference was for women’s fun zones to be a certain way. I’m not talking shaved, trimmed or tidy. Harry Beaver liked it to be a seventies afro down there! As I said, everyone has their preferences but it doesn’t stop me being surprised by them. Harry took a full frontal in front of the mirror for his photo message. I deleted it immediately but I still have nightmares about the smug grin on his face, not to mention the open legs and Godzilla hanging between them.

Thankfully, I’m not the type to embrace evil tactics but I could have been. Imagine if I was the type to post it online. Or had shown it to everyone I knew. Or projected the image of that smirk and meat stick onto the House of Commons. It would have meant some humiliation for him, maybe affected later relationships, friendships and his job. It was also hugely uncomfortable when I recognised him as he walked through town a few weeks later. Thankfully, he didn’t see the uncomfortable lady gawking and blanching in his direction.

Don’t let yourself be the victim of someone else’s madness. Be body proud but don’t be a humiliated, regretful fool that let one second of fun damage their lives.

D is for Dick Pics

dick picsThe weirdest thing I found during my foray into online dating was that even the sweet guys send dick pics. One guy I was particularly fond of sent me a picture of his cock with a dickie bow around it because it was nearly my birthday. That’s taking it to a whole new level…to the dizzy heights of a dickie pic! It was a level no one has come close to since. He certainly knew how to stand out as did his very hard “little” friend.

So why do guys send pictures of their cocks to unsuspecting online potentials? I’m pulsating with ideas, they have penetrated my mind and filled my consciousness as they pound me endlessly. But if you throb with excitement too then don’t feel shafted. Make sure you plunder my twitter with your own thoughts.

Why Do Men Persist in Sending Dick Pics?

Here are the ideas I’ve banged out (and please accept my apologies for the puns, I couldn’t resist whacking them out):

  • They’re looking for validation. We all need to feel attractive and wanted at times. For me, that means wearing a stunning dress and being told I look beautiful. Maybe some men get the same glowing feeling by sending a picture of their cock and waiting for the compliments to roll in.
  • The guys want you to see how hard you make them. It could be that they’re surprised at just how quick and rock hard they’ve become and want to share that. One guy used to tell me frequently “I adore you and you make me as hard as hell”. The compliment being that not only did he think I was great but he was also taken aback at how hard it made him to speak to me. The picture could be the guy’s immature way of paying you a compliment.
  • Mr Dick Pic wants you to imagine what sex with him would be like. He’s a visual guy and so this is how he translates his thoughts to you. He’s been thinking about sex with you; he wants to have sex with you. The part of him suggesting that you should have a nice date where he tries to woo you has gone from his head. It may have taken a permanent holiday while he thinks about sex with you.
  • The fella is trying to charm you and make you smile. A joke would probably go down a lot better. Unfortunately, the sensible part of their brain that tells them that one of the most unattractive parts of their body isn’t going to win you over is being drowned in horny-ness.
  • They want a picture in return. This is the most likely reason, in my opinion. Think of it as tit for tat. They’ve shown you their tat so now they want to see some tit. However, I’ve been sent many dick pics and I’ve never sent a tit pic, or a fanny photo. So, to say it’s not a winning strategy is a massive understatement.

Stay Safe (and Anonymous)

In the next blog post, I’ll talk about the ways you can send an intimate picture that will protect your privacy and, hopefully, provide the intended turn-on rather than sending the other person screaming into the night.

Meanwhile, let me know if you’ve ever sent an intimate photo or received a really funny or unusual one. Add your comments below or share it on my Facebook page.

C is for…Casual Sex and Condoms (Continued)

casual sex and condomsIf you don’t want casual sex how do you avoid those who do? In my last update, C is for Casual Sex and Condoms, I talked about being honest about what you’re looking for from online potentials. Personally, I’m not looking for casual sex or one night stands. So, I tend to avoid guys that include semi-nude photos in their profiles and those that have dodgy user names or taglines.

What do I mean by that?

Here are some names that got a no, even though they did amuse me:
• teasetoplease
• spunkmonkey
• mingelover
• iknowhowtouseit

And profile taglines:
• No fanny too big or too small
• Good body and with a big tool for hard and hot work
• Looking for hook up for me and another woman

Douchebag Deidre

It’s safe to say that whatever we want we can find it online. The skill is trying to separate the liars, psychos and dickheads from those that are looking for the same as us. They are out there too.

This brings me to Douchebag Deidre and my friend Horace. Horace and Deidre were in contact for a month or so and he was smitten. Chuckles were as frequent as the multitude of texts they sent each other. They had a lot in common. Even the things they bought when they went junk food shopping matched like a game of snap. I could see Horace was quickly captivated and the conversations they had that he dared to share with me were sweet and lovely. Had Horace finally found someone he could flirt with and be in a relationship with?

textingNot long after they started chatting, Deidre explained that she hadn’t been separated from her husband for very long. Together they had joint custody of their young daughter. That wasn’t an issue for Horace and so they decided it was time to move beyond texting and set a date for meeting. The planning wasn’t easy because Deidre had just moved to a new place, which was an hour away. And obviously the daughter was staying over some nights too. But eventually the hopeful first meeting was set in stone.

The texts continued.

Some of the texts sent by Deidre included “I wish you were here with me right now” and “Please don’t go to sleep yet, I want to keep texting.” They seemed happy chatting to each other like this and all was going well.

Three nights before they were due to meet, Deidre had a bit too much prosecco. The truth started to reveal itself, with a bit of cajoling by Horace. Apparently, she was drunk and feeling sorry for herself. It didn’t take much for her to confess she wasn’t getting on well with her parents because they were on the side of her ex-husband. She had a history of dumping men when life got difficult. Deidre confessed that she’d split up with one long term boyfriend in the last couple of months, been married twice and had only left her husband six months earlier. The numbers didn’t add up.

The words continued to pour from her slightly sozzled mouth. When sober, Deidre had mentioned that marriage still appealed to her. In her drunkenness she admitted that she had no intention of marrying again.

“I’m not sure if I can treat a man properly again because my daughter is the only thing that matters to me. That won’t change. No man will ever matter to me again”.

The most shocking aspect was when she presumed their upcoming date would involve sex because she “could do better” than him.

Honesty – the Best Policy

Horace was stunned and spoke to me at length about what had happened and how he should respond. Over their entire conversation his feelings had waned and, although the idea of no strings sex appealed, it wasn’t what he wanted. The next day he contacted Deidre and explained that maybe she wasn’t in the right place to be dating and certainly not to be dating him. It was Deidre’s turn to be surprised, although not particularly bothered.

Maybe she couldn’t remember what she’d said in her alcohol fuelled state or maybe she was just unsure what the problem was. After all, she was of the opinion she was out of Horace’s league so why wouldn’t he want her? Had Deidre been honest at the start then it would have saved Horace a lot of time and energy.

Casual Sex and Condoms too

But this section of the A to Z isn’t just about casual sex, condoms are a feature too. Whatever your “thing” is, whether casual sex or sex in a relationship, always use a condom. I’m not going to beat about the bush, I’m sure your Tinder date will beat your bush a lot better than I can!

At the end of 2015, doctors were suggesting that dating apps were causing an increase in the rates of sexually transmitted diseases. I’m sure we could debate this endlessly but, ultimately, people have unprotected sex with people they meet and nowadays they often meet via online dating. Save yourself some awkward trips to the STI clinic and use a condom. You don’t know where the person you’re sleeping with has been, no matter what they tell you. It takes ages to get to know someone and people do lie, as I’ve already proved.

So wrap it up or make sure he does because the consequences aren’t pretty. Googling pictures of STIs will convince you of just how ugly it can get.

Coming up, D is for the dreaded Dick Pic! Meanwhile, don’t forget to “like” my Facebook page and follow me on Twitter for regular updates.

C is for…Casual Sex and Condoms

casual sexSome people do casual sex and some don’t. Whether we do or not it’s no one’s business but ours and the person we may or may not be sleeping with. Casual sex is a personal choice and will be based on many factors. These can include the person you’re considering doing it with, your general mood, the level of affection, what location is available and how much you’ve had to drink. It can be a well-planned military operation or as spontaneous as turning up at an airport and buying a ticket to the first location you see.

I know people who’ve done it and people who haven’t. If you want to do it then jump right in, preferably not feet first as that makes it a bit more complicated. But make sure that if that’s your choice, it’s the choice of the person you’re sleeping with as well.

Casual Sex is Not An Excuse for Lying

Maybe your aim is to screw as many people as possible and hit some round numbers. It’s good to have a goal in life, but be honest about it. If that’s what you want then you shouldn’t pretend differently. There’s lots of people out there of both sexes who are looking for casual sex. So, let’s do the world a favour and not mindf**k someone who’s looking for something longer term. In the same way, if you’re looking for long term don’t pretend you’re fine with casual sex and then turn into a psycho when casual sex is all you get.

Online dating doesn’t have to be a game. But if you’re doing it at someone else’s expense and enjoying hurting people in the process then maybe you need to see a counsellor and not the underwear of someone who is looking for marriage and has been led to believe that’s your aim too.

Let’s Be Honest

I recall a couple of years ago when I had my first foray into app dating sites. A pleasant guy and one of my matches started chatting with me. It went something like:

Seymour: Hey. Hope you’re having a good night. What sort of thing are you looking for on here?

Me: Probably just dating and then seeing how it goes. Maybe a relationship eventually. How about you?

Seymour: I’m hoping to find someone that I can have sex with tonight.

Me: Ah okay, I’m afraid that’s not me but good luck.

Seymour: You too. Laters!

We then moved on, hopefully to others who were more what we wanted. In my innocence I was surprised at his brazen and candid reply but now I wish all the guys I spoke to were as honest as Seymour.

On one app and website you can specify from a drop down list what you’re looking for. This includes, “is looking for a relationship” and “is looking for casual dating/no commitment”.

Thank goodness for these options, although they’re pretty pointless unless you’re honest. So, just be honest!

In my next post, I’ll share some of the ways you can spot those guys that are only interested in casual sex and, as promised, we’ll touch on the very important topic of condoms.

Boredom and Loneliness and Staying Focused on Your Goal

In the last blog post, B is for Boredom, I talked about some of the reasons we join dating sites. Although B is for Boredom, this is really more about staying focused on your goals and remaining honest about them.

If we lose our focus then we run into problems. To explain this I shall tell you about Slick Dick.

Boredom and Loneliness

boredom and lonelinessSlick Dick was a guy I met on one of the paid dating sites. I will discuss later the people we can find on the multitude of sites, including the ones more likely to be frequented by those who are looking for a night of fun or a lifetime of happiness. Guys like Dick weren’t normally found on the paid sites.

He was on the rebound; it was obvious, eventually. Sadly, even the obvious is difficult to see when your eyes are focusing on an attractive face and a heart-stopping smile. The guy was gorgeous. Anyway, I shouldn’t get side-tracked, that was the problem in the first place. I suspect Dick may have been hurt, come out of a long-term relationship and didn’t really know what possibilities were out there. He was a fast learner. Dick was easy to talk to, a bit shy but still good at flirting. He could make you feel as sexy as a woman in a Justin Timberlake song and have I mentioned…hot hot hot! Sadly, he became wise to this pretty quickly. Overnight he went from a relatively innocent charmer who wanted to go on a date, to someone who would mess with your head in a bad way.

From Shy to Slick

Days before we were due to meet I came down with flu. So we rescheduled. Slick was suddenly only free on one day within the next three weeks. And the location would have to be within a short distance from where he lived because his puppy (not a euphemism) couldn’t be left alone. The holiday he had from work was nearly over and I was told several times “my hands are tied”.

The date was scheduled for three days’ time but as it got closer the once shy Slick was becoming very cocky. It turned out that the original plan of a nice meal and maybe walking his dog was not enough anymore. Slick explained to me that I was a sure thing and during this date we would be having sex. I was adamant that was not the case. It shocked him completely, so much so that he must have lost the ability to use his phone. The texts swiftly reduced to nearly non-existent, unless his horn rose up in his pants.

The date never happened. The day slot he could fit me into turned into an afternoon that would involve less time than I would spend driving there and back. Then the afternoon got postponed and two days later I was ghosted (see G is for Ghosting later in this series). I almost did something very stupid for a pretty face. You’d think I would only need to learn that lesson once but sadly not; I forget it approximately every six months.

Stay Focussed

Maybe I should give Slick the benefit of the doubt. Maybe he met someone in the meantime and didn’t know how to tell me.

But I was left wondering, what changed?

Dick initially seemed to be a slightly innocent and sweet guy. I guess he could have been really good at playing games and I was just as good at not seeing them. However, I suspect Slick got a lot more attention than he expected when he started internet dating and began to believe his own hype.

Lots of girls would have been into Dick. I could be wrong but what drew me closer to this thought was when he accidentally sent me the photo of another girl he was talking to instead of the photo he was trying to send. Bless him, he couldn’t think of a lie quick enough to explain who she was. Maybe he was just more Dick than Slick.

LonelinessWe can all get carried away with the attention we get when we first join sites. I’m sure I’ve overlooked potentials because of a pretty face, a seductive comment and the odd kiss ass. I hope Slick Dick eventually found what he was looking for and had an enjoyable time doing it.

Your Reasons are Not Their Reasons

A very wise person once told me that in life we never know what someone else is thinking and that seems especially true when it comes to online dating.

We might be chatting to someone who is trying to bring some excitement into their life while their spouse sleeps soundly in another room. It might be that a potential has been cheated on and they’re searching for desperately needed validation. Or we could be in contact with a scared and lonely virgin who has never had a first kiss let alone a boyfriend or girlfriend.

We will never truly know what’s going on in the head of the person we’re chatting to and what their motives are for joining the dating sites. Only we can decide what we believe and if the situation is worth it.

What are your reasons for online dating? Ever been seduced by a Slick Dick? Let us know on our Facebook page or below in the comments.

B is for…Boredom

Boredom can be a bit of a dating plague but…you’re doing internet dating and have done for a while. So let me ask you something as we hit B.

Why did you start internet dating?

b is for boredomSit, think, maybe boil the kettle, grab yourself a digestive and have a really good contemplative moment.

Why did you join the site(s) you’re on, why did you decide to download that app or come up with that weird username that you spent about half an hour thinking about? Why did you search through all your photos to find the one that made you look hotter than normal but still vaguely like yourself? Do you remember the day you spent hours trying to take the flawless Kim Kardashian selfie? Maybe you were picking the perfect outfit, you know the one that hides your protruding belly, gives your boobs that lift, suggests you have a six pack or makes you look hilarious (delete as appropriate).

All this effort must have been for a reason. Unless you didn’t put any effort into the process at all. Shame on you, you know who you are.

There’s no point being worried or ashamed. If there was a reason what was it? Say it in your head right now.

Go on, say it.

Reasons for Internet Dating

It’s safe to say that people do internet dating for a multitude of reasons. Here are some of mine from the last couple of years:

• Because I wanted to find love
• Because I wanted to feel turned on
• Because I missed texting guys
• Because I wanted to go on dates
• Because I was hurting
• Because I wanted to feel attractive
• Because I wanted to find a boyfriend

I can’t say I’m proud of all of those reasons, in fact until I started writing them down I’d probably never admitted some of them.

Maybe yours are more varied and surprising. Some of the reasons from guys I’ve spoken to have included:
• To get laid
• To have sex
• To shove their cock in someone

I’m joking, I know there are more reasons that that, although I expect sex is frequently in the back of our minds.

Real reasons have included:
• Boredom
• Wanting a spouse
• Loneliness
• Feeling ugly
• Wanting a baby
• Being on the rebound
• Not able to pick up a potential in “real life”, maybe because they’re busy, not confident
• Told to by their mates or signed up by mates
• To move on in life
• Finding someone to do things with at weekends
• To stop hurting
• To meet new people
• Wanting someone to care about them
• Wanting to feel accepted for who they are
• Sex, sex and of course sex

boredomB is for Boredom

When it comes to online dating we need to remember our reasons for doing it and stay focused on them. If you want sex then focus on that, if you want a boyfriend or girlfriend then don’t forget it.

I mentioned in the title of this post that B is for Boredom and that is a genuine reason for many to pursue online dating. We don’t like to be bored, especially as boredom can lead to loneliness. It’s as valid a reason as any other to try online dating. In the next post, I’ll tell you about Slick Dick and how he went from a seemingly nice, honest guy looking to escape loneliness to a person who lost that focus, leaving me and possibly others in the lurch due to his lack of honesty about his new found goals.

I’d Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That)


In the last blog post (Let’s Start at the Very Beginning: A is for…), we were talking about preferences and why I don’t refer to them as fetishes. I mentioned that what turns one person on may be terrifying to another.

One guy told me that he liked to watch his partner have sex with someone else while he wanked himself off. The woman was his “own personal pornstar”. He’d actually acted this preference out with his ex-wife, twice. I was shocked and must have been obvious about it because we didn’t speak much after that.

I’d Do Anything for Love…Maybe?

Depending on who we are and what we’re into, a potential may share a preference that initially freaks us out. But, eventually, after more details are shared, we might start to consider it and not run for the hills while voice dialling the nearest mental health worker.

Let me introduce you to Peter Wang who I dated for a while.

Peter Wang was one of those rare joys that you find in a guy. Games and manipulation weren’t part of his repertoire, and I imagined that he could be a best friend for life. Peter was always there for me. Nights spent apart, he’d ask me to call when I was safely home and he’d phone when he was on his way home too.

But there was a query: was Peter boyfriend material?

Peter Pan Syndrome

Sadly, the answer was a resounding “no”. I struggled with physical and sexual attraction when it came to Peter. Even though we were similar ages he had a concerning level of immaturity. Peter was a loveable geek and I liked that side of him. But there were still things that put me off, including the teen posters still tacked to his wall and the realisation he had more sci-fi toys and merchandise than floor space. Getting to the single bed was quite a struggle. Maybe you’re thinking, “Give the guy a break, living with your parents and dating is hard in your early twenties”. I agree, but this guy was nearly thirty and he lived with friends.

fetishMaybe I’m doing him a disservice, because he really made me laugh and gave me a love and respect that was rare in life. Finally, I felt like a prize that only the best deserved. I felt sexually attractive in a way I’d never felt before. The night we spent just sleeping in bed resulted in him being so permanently hard that he uttered, “Oh my God, if this carries on I think I’m going to need to see a doctor!”

Unfortunately, all he got that night was a giggle.

When you’ve met as many dickheads as I had, Peter seemed special. Sadly it didn’t work out because sometimes it just doesn’t. And I used to wistfully wonder, “Is he still in Neverland refusing to grow up?”

WAM Bam…

WAM sploshingOne of the reasons for the lack of long-term relationship wasn’t his preference. You may have heard of WAM before but, until Peter confessed this fantasy I hadn’t. How people’s minds work and what turns them on left me stunned.

WAM is “wet and messy play.” Before your mind spirals in numerous directions, as mine may have done, stop! We’re not talking urine and faeces in the bedroom. Have you ever watched someone get a custard pie in the face and found yourself getting hard? Maybe the thought of bringing gunge into the bedroom makes you wet with excitement? No? Then you’re not into WAM.

For some it’s the image of gloop running down the face, falling between the breasts. For others, it’s the idea of being covered in a messy, sticky substance that isn’t cum. But then another group of people enjoy the anticipation, the anxiety that goes with the possibility that it might happen, the fear and excitement that accompanies being humiliated in public. Imagine people watching and laughing as you’re gunged with the man or woman of your dreams. That can be a massive preference, one that people aren’t always keen to share.

…Thank You Ma’am

I was never fully sure which aspect of WAM turned Peter on the most. And I didn’t get his preference myself. It wasn’t for me.

With potentials and partners we might be willing to do some things we find unusual. That might include putting all our effort into blow jobs when we don’t enjoy them, sticking something up our arse or dressing up as a superhero, secretary or soldier.

For Peter Wang’s future girlfriend it may mean custard pies and gunge in the shower. I never went there but she might be more willing.

I’ll leave you with this question: how far would you go or how far have you already gone for someone you care about or love?

When Meatloaf said he would “do anything for love but I won’t do that” I wonder if he was talking about WAM or anal?

Tell me how far you’ve gone either here or on the Facebook page. You don’t have to share the gory details – just let us know how far you went out of your comfort zone and if it was worth it.

Sunshine Blogger Award

Gracie Mae DeLunac asked me a few questions for the Sunshine Blogger Award.

Per Gracie Mae’s blogpost: “The Sunshine Blogger Award is a “get to know the writer better” type of blogging exercise, with a couple of rules attached:

  1. Answer all 11 questions asked by the blogger who nominated you.
  2. Nominate eleven bloggers in return and write eleven (possibly fiendish) questions for them to answer.”

Sunshine Blogger Award Answers

Here are my answers to Grace Mae’s questions:

1. What is your favorite movie/tv show quote? What is it from? Why is it your favorite?

I love the television show Psych and they have some excellent but random quotes, including the title of one of their episodes, “Poker? I Barely Know Her.” But they don’t tend to translate well on paper. However, I do love “You were only supposed to blow the bloody doors off” from the film The Italian Job. I love that the film is full of charm, good British fun and the escape scenes are incredible. That said nothing beats a night in the pub spent quoting Anchorman quotes. Those nights are endless.

“I’m very important. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.”

One day I’ll be able to tell people this.

2. What do you like to think about most when plotting (Characters, plotline, plot twists, villainous acts, etc.)?

Plotlines and the secrets that go with them. Why do people do what they do, what is their background and how will that affect the plot.

3. What is your preference of “apocalyptic” groups: zombies, aliens, or mutants?

It may sound foolish but I think the biggest apocalyptic group are humans with all their weird forms and dastardly minds. After that…maybe aliens.

4. What kind of food do you eat to feel decent enough to write?

I tend to binge bad food like chocolate and crisps when writing. But they’re not good for my energy levels and I think I need to find better foods.

5. Do you bring your own personal views (especially political and religious) into your tales?

I tend not to get political in my writing, it’s not the right place for it. However, my knowledge of Christianity, and my experiences of it, falls into my stories in ways even I don’t expect.

6. Would you say you “commune” better with nature when gardening [hands on], lounging outside [kinda near], or viewing it from inside your place [far away]?

I respect nature the most when I’m walking or sitting in it. Nothing like summer rain hitting your bare skin as you smell freshly wet grass, love it.

7. What is the strangest/rudest thing you have ever heard your written characters say?

One of my characters is crude to the point of vomit inducing, she says whatever she wants and mostly she wants to say dirty, liquid based, stomach churning things.

8. Paper or plastic or re-usable?

Re-usable. A close friend is an environmentalist and I’m scared of incurring her wrath.

9. What movie/book/show would you say has made the most impression on you? When? Why/how?

I’m not sure I’m proud to say this but Dawson’s Creek had a profound effect on me. It was the first time I cried at love and unrequited love. I learnt that bad boys aren’t necessarily bad (yep, I fell in love with Pacey) and their imperfections are what make them interesting. It showed me the power of humour in drama too and it helped me to believe that in the end you can “ride” off into the sunset. Sometimes the right guy isn’t the obvious guy, at first anyway, this has impacted my writing too. That was in my mid to late teens.

I also enjoyed things like Cagney and Lacey and X-Files as a child. Strong female leads are inspiring to a young girl.

The most significant books for my writing were those written by Karen Rose. Through her I learnt about building sexual tension. I also saw that sex in books doesn’t limit the characters but opens them up to explore the impact of their past while finding a new future. Also, they can have sex and fall in love, it doesn’t have to be sex just for the sake of it. I started reading these about five years ago and have now read every book she’s written.

10. What is your favorite color? [Monty Python reference? ? ]

Blue. I swear 80% of my clothes seem to be blue without any planning on my part.

11. If you were able to publish one of your tales and go somewhere to showcase it (author tour, opening night for the movie, etc.), where would you go? Why?

If it was my Trying Every Angle series (a sports erotic romance) then I would love to take it to the next location of the Rugby World Cup. In 2019 it will be Japan. Alternatively to America, maybe California, to an erotic writing event.

My Nominations

I nominate bloggers:

R.B. O’Brien Author
CK
Candace Khun, CandyKaBoom
John Dupree
Paul Jameson, Modquokka
R K Hawthorne
Sarah Correia, sarahguestperry
Lady Writer, Eva Deverell
Elia Winters
Kelly Sedinger, Jaquandor
Molly, Mollysdailykiss

My eleven questions are:

  1. What is your favourite song? Do you have a significant memory attached to a time you listened to it?
  2. Where do you love to blog/write the most?
  3. If you could make up a fear of something what would it be of and what would it be called?
  4. Italian or French? (in whatever context you decide)
  5. What do you think killed the dinosaurs? (can be as creative an answer as you like)
  6. What is the strangest thing you’ve ever had to research for your writing/blogging?
  7. What can you hear right now? What would you prefer to be listening to?
  8. What do you do when you feel you should be writing but are lacking in inspiration?
  9. What is your greatest achievement?
  10. If you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life what would it be?
  11. Who is your favourite author and why?

Let’s Start at the Very Beginning: A is for…


I don’t think you’ll guess…

After the many guys I’ve chatted with and the dates I’ve been on I thought I’d put my knowledge to good use by sharing it with others. As you may have already realised, my style is very much tongue-in-cheek. It’s safe to say I’m not a relationship guru, so if you’re hoping that by the end of reading these blog posts you’ll be magically married and ready to pop a baby out then you should probably look elsewhere. But if you want a bit of a giggle at real life stories while learning some of the things to watch out for online then keep reading.

While all these stories are based on real life events I’ve changed the names of the men and women involved. For the occasional story, some of the details and the gender of the people involved has been changed too. I’ve done it to protect the innocent and the guilty and in some cases give a little chuckle too.

Enjoy the stories and heed the advice, if it’s relevant. It might result in you looking at all the people you see on the street in a completely new way.

A is for Anal and other preferences

I don’t want to start our reader/writer friendship in a bad place but there’s something I need to tell you, something I can’t hide for much longer. There is something you should know and it may ruin what we’re already working on here…

The thing is, can I really say it…?

I guess I have to tell you that my name is Rebecca and I am…

…someone who doesn’t understand what’s so great about anal.

analI know many people, men and women, love it. I get told about it often and even cajoled (unsuccessfully) into trying it. One guy even suggested starting me off with a finger. Thankfully he kept his fingers to himself. Personally, when it comes to that preference, I don’t get it.

But the one thing we have to accept is that everyone has their own preferences. And the ecstasy or abject terror that goes with internet dating is that we’re opening our metaphorical and sometimes literal door to those preferences. This door might reveal a horny bugger who will happily stick it in the usual holes or a woman who will want her areas caressed before you get close. It might also mean meeting those who have a thing for the slightly more unusual.

What are Preferences?

If we’re willing to discover the joys and mysteries of internet dating, especially the more unusual sites, then we’ll hear from some of life’s crazy creatures. The beauty of chatting to such a range of people is that we may discover ‘preferences’ we didn’t know we had. And suddenly we’re opening our world to a new and exciting chapter of our lives.

Note to reader – you may be wondering why I keep saying preferences when I could easily be using the word fetishes. When it comes to preferences it can cover everything from kissing in the ear to wearing a collar and being led around the garden. In Ancient Rome giving fellatio, i.e. performing oral sex on someone was abhorrent. Nowadays, that is probably as tame as sex can get. Is oral sex a fetish? I have friends who think oral is not their thing and a pretty disgusting act whereas others find it mundane. So what is a preference to one person can be the work of the devil to another and a normal part of the day to someone else. Fetish seems to be associated with judgement and so I’m going with preference. It’s up to you how you see it.

What About Spanking?

anal and spankingMy internet dating life has brought me into contact with a variety of guys with a massive range of preferences. I know what I like but it doesn’t stop others trying to convince me I’m weird. One example was a guy called Bob Ajob, who didn’t get past the texting stage. We had a message conversation that went something like:

Bob: So what turns you on?

Me: Different things, it depends on the situation, location, etc.

Bob: What about spanking?

Me: Doesn’t really do it for me to be honest.

Bob: Seriously?

Me: Yep.

Bob: I’ve never met a woman who doesn’t like to be spanked.

(At this point I spend a couple of moments questioning my preferences. Am I weird, am I the only woman in the world who doesn’t like being spanked, is there something wrong with me?)

Me: You’re joking, right?

Bob: No, every woman loves it. Every woman I’ve ever met. I can’t believe you’re not into it.

We’re All Unique

We’re getting to know people, putting a bit of ourselves out there and as a result we may end up questioning what we think we know. Every individual is unique and as a result into different things. There might be potentials out there that make phone sex sound like the most appealing thing you can do with your mouth… well, maybe the second most appealing thing. For some women it can be a fulfilling experience that utilises a verbal dexterity that has you coming in seconds. Apparently, Irish accents are particularly enlightening, especially when coupled with intelligent linguistic ability. Other potentials may say that unless you’ve been urinated on during foreplay then you haven’t lived.

Basically, anything can be preference. I’ve had conversations on role play, locations, positions, what they wanted to watch me do and how stiletto heels and wet look leggings should be my only clothing option! As it happens, I don’t look like Rihanna in that ensemble. Instead I look like a freak on stilts wearing a pair of shiny, skin tight bin bags that bring out hives. Think Ross in “Friends” wearing leather trousers. Not pretty and certainly not a prequel to any sexy fun.

In the next blog post we’ll continue with the letter A and this idea of preferences and what may be hot for one person will make another person run as far and as fast as they can in the opposite direction.

Don’t forget to share your thoughts and own stories in the comments section, on Twitter or on Facebook.